**** Inhumanimal ****

Official website of Devin Hansen

  • Fiction (6)
  • Journal (20)
  • In the Media (6)
  • Ice Hockey (1996-1998)

    February 3, 2020

    Journal

    In 1996 at the age of 21 I decided I wanted to play ice hockey. I’d never even tied on a pair of ice-skates, but I had some pretty stellar reflexes. So I went to the ice-rink every day that summer and taught myself to skate. I even went to the tennis courts and had a


    Recycled Chicken Coop (2015)

    January 31, 2020

    Journal

    My third attempt at a chicken coop. This time I used panels from an old garage door, which had nice windows to observe the chickens (if you do this, be sure to put chicken wire on the inside so they don’t break the glass). I built it based on the lessons I learned from my


    Five Rules for 2020

    January 27, 2020

    Journal

    Pick live worms off the sidewalk. ~ Listen to old people’s stories. ~ Make faces at random children. ~ Question everything. ~ Always know when to leave.


    From the Mouth of Babes

    January 27, 2020

    Journal

    “There’s something weird to me, daddy,” said my eight year old daughter. “What’s that, baby?” “The more I listen to directions in art. The worse it is.” I smiled. “When I don’t listen to directions, it’s good.” I gave her a hug. Another starving artist in the making.


    Sunshine and Shoulders

    January 27, 2020

    Fiction

    One morning I felt like singing that John Denver song, about sunshine and shoulders. It was the first warm day after a long winter that everyone described as “brutal.” I went to work and hurried through my deliveries, finishing the route two hours early. So I strolled downtown with a joint cupped in my hand.


    Tomato, Tomahto

    January 27, 2020

    Fiction

    We were elbowed at the bar by Noon. My friend with the bigger tattoo sleeves. Both of us there to cure our hangovers. “Damn, I’ve been on a bender,” he said. “Are you sure you didn’t call me last night?” “I’m sure,” I said, tipping back the first beer. “You didn’t ask me to let


    Now is Not the Worst of Times

    January 27, 2020

    Journal

    “America is drowning in wickedness and immorality,” said Evangelist Billy Sunday in the 1900’s. It’s a message we still hear today, and not just from the preachers and proselytizers. Many people say that our tastes in sex and violence are more perverted and fierce. While it’s true we have our fair share of crime, I


    In Praise of a Small House (2005)

    January 27, 2020

    Journal

    The place is a mere 1200 square feet, but somehow we all fit: three kids, two adults, and a dog with a serious eating problem. We’re all packed into this modest house built around 1945, with two bedrooms, one bath, and a finished basement. The previous owners of the home raised a family of five


    Stains Part 2

    January 14, 2020

    Journal

    Only in a Midwestern tavern will you hear two men debate the sexual prowess of Gene Simmons versus Brett Michaels. And sadly, this is probably the most interesting conversation I’ll hear for weeks. ~ There are few things as enjoyable as showing a child how to knock down dominoes or fill a jar with fireflies.


    Stains

    January 14, 2020

    Journal

    What better way to justify perversion than with the promise of salvation? ~ Nostalgia can be a drug too. ~ One of the best things about monogamy, is that you use condoms for birth-control instead of pest-control. ~ Sometimes I wonder if aliens planted the idea of god in our mind, and they’re tallying our